i am procrasinating again

Haiz there is still a ton of things for me to do but I chose to take a break this weekend. BAD choice i know but really cannot last so long without a break.
Anyways, my back is killing me. I don’t know what did I do that made it hurt as much as it is hurting now. Ended up walking like a duck (with butt stuck out) whenever I stand up from a chair. ..
I also want to achieve self-actualization but the things that I have to do now is leaving me with no time to consider others.
I often feel that the harder I try at trying to write down what i feel, the more idiotic I sound. Typical case of trying too hard.. :S
How is it that when I read blogs of others I feel like i can relate to what they are saying, feel like they have such an insight to life but when I read over what I have written :X it is like toxic waste. . .
Not proud to say that I am surviving but still proud of all my achievement so far. Hope I can say the same thing at the end of this sem.

 

shelter

Like the wind avoids the rain, I am watching you from my shelter
Even though my love for you overflows
Can I love you? Can I hold you?
I’m about to drown in my worries. I can’t forgive myself for hesitating.
I want to know why, I want to know why

–rap–

When we met my girl, I knew it would be like this
Do you feel me? The only one I’ve been looking for
I can’t breathe my word. My words turn into tears
Do you feel me? The sound of the rain that hits my heart
I always want to keep you smiling. I’m sorry that I made you sad [T/N hang your head]
But please keep waiting
Don’t give up your love, stay by my side
I need your love, I need your love

–Rap–

If I reach out my hand, my girl, I’ll believe that you’ll be able to understand
Do you feel me? Even if there are wounds left
The place you are is my world. If you open the doors again
Do you feel me? I want to feel your sound

-by Jejung and Yuchun <Shelter>

just feel that the lyrics are so beautiful that I have to post it. I will always be there for you even if u don’t know of my existence.

I can only say this emotion can apply to friends. I love you guys and I will be there for you. Although I may not be able to stay by ur side all the time, I will be there when u need me. You may have forgotten about me but I haven’t….

 

3 weeks

3 weeks have passed so quickly. looking forward and at the same time dreading the first day of the new semester. I think i am still not ready to go back and meet new pple….

 

over active mind

what is it that makes you want to do better in one aspect when someone praises you on another aspect? Isn’t the most economical and efficient way is to focus on what is good and continue to improve it? why is there a need to prove pple wrong? The desire to be an all-rounder. The impossible dream to be perfect or at least appear perfect to others. The lust for success.

 

haha was asked why I am so emo. lol the product of an over-active mind and a temporary low. Not depressed just a temporary low caused by mood swings. Instead of going onto facebook and playing brainless games, i decided to write and blog. type what pops out in my mind and the thoughts that  followed. chaotic but I like it. XD

Maybe all my subsequent post will become as chaotic as the one before XD Enjoying the thought exercises that make my mind move!!

 

最近让我的心灵有一丝丝感动的一首歌

偶尔会转到channel v 看一下MV。 就在我不经意时， 看到了五月天的MV XD

好感动。在那短短的几分钟，这首MV让我好感动。

简单明了的歌词， 琅琅上口的旋律， 深深的体会。

有没有那么一滴眼泪　能洗掉后悔

我们往往会在事情发生后后悔。 后悔为什么我做了什么/没做什么。那我们是不是因该思考到底我们花了多少的时间去后悔，去难过？

带不走的那些　遗憾和眷恋　都化成最后一滴泪

直到在打这的时候， 我才去找了这首歌的歌词。 才发现到我的领悟是如何的和歌词吻合。 。 。 好歌就是如此的简单得到他人的认同 ：）

如烟
词：阿信　曲：石头
mv导演：林书宇

我坐在床前　望着窗外　回忆满天
生命是华丽错觉　时间是贼　偷走一切
七岁的那一年　抓住那只蝉　以为能抓住那只蝉
十七岁的那年　吻过他的脸　就以为和他能永远

有没有那么一种永远　永远不改变
拥抱过的美丽都　再也不破碎
让险峻岁月不能在脸上撒野　让生离和死别都遥远
有谁能听见

我坐在床前　转过头看　谁在沉睡
那一张苍老的脸　好像是我　紧闭双眼
曾经是爱我的　和我深爱的　都围绕在我身边
带不走的那些　遗憾和眷恋　都化成最后一滴泪

有没有那么一滴眼泪　能洗掉后悔
化成大雨降落在　回不去的街
再给我一次机会　将故事改写
或欠了他一生的　一句抱歉

有没有那么一个世界　永远不天黑
星星太阳万物都　听我的指挥
月亮不忙着圆缺　春天不走远
树梢紧紧拥抱著树叶　有谁能听见

耳际　眼前　此生重演　是我来自漆黑 而又回归漆黑
人间　瞬间　天地之间　下次我　又是谁

有没有那么一朵玫瑰　永远不凋谢
永远骄傲和完美　永远不妥协
为何人生最后会像一张纸屑 还不如一片花瓣曾经鲜艳

有没有那么一张书签　停止那一天
最单纯的笑脸和　最美那一年
书包里面装满了蛋糕和汽水
双眼只有无猜和无邪　让我们无法无天

有没有那么一首诗篇　找不到句点
青春永远定居在　我们的岁月
男孩和女孩都有吉他和舞鞋
笑忘人间的苦痛　只有甜美

有没有那么一个明天　重头活一遍
让我再次感受曾　挥霍的昨天
无论生存或生活　我都不浪费　不让故事这么的后悔
有谁能听见　我不要告别

我坐在床前　看着指尖　已经如烟

 

nite post continued

lol I am back to continue. Anyways, i think the ktv session was the first time i can tahan singing for so long ahahhaha from 7 to 11pm.  super long. super exhausted by the end of the session.

after working for 5 weeks, i really want to go back to school to study. . .

 

second post in the office

back in office for the 3 day in the week! hahhaha trying to keep myself optimistic for the day(s) to come. Went ten dollar KTV ytd night with the office people. Woah! hahahah their stamina is good! I am like dead by ten pm. Left at 11pm and reached home at 11 plus, 12 mn.

As a result, my eyes are swollen shut when i woke up in the morning. In my desperate attempts to make my eyes stay open, I resorted to using my fingers……. hahaha END RESULTS: open but horribly different shaped eyes. :X

back later to continue

 

blogging in the morning

in the office now so this post won’t be long. I wanna meet u guys for gathering Suffocating in boredom at work. Really experiencing the shallow feeling stage of my life. the interaction with my colleagues is most of the time, funny. but it just cannot get a bigger response out of me.

 

first, er…. second post

really feeling very shallow feelings lately which is really weird… really weird foreign feelings.

 

new world

decide to move to a new place at wordpress.

hopefully it will a tranquil place for me to vent myself